Today it is Katie's birthday. She is 14. The other humans all got up nice and early cos they thought they could go out for the day. But Katie stayed in bed. Mummy had to force her to get up at 11am and open her presents. She gotted a new mobile phone off us (her family I mean, not just us houndies, we doesn't even have jobs) and she gotted a hamper of stuff - she did ask if she could have this last week so Mummy went to Mr Tesco and picked some nice things for her. She got her a nice basket what she can put on her shelf to keep things in and some trainer socks, mascara, loads of hair and face creams and lotions and stuff and some sweeties and a can of non alcoholic strawberry daquiri so she can have a growed up drink without being irresponsible. And hmmm what else? Me can't remember...anyway she liked her hamper and her phone. She got a lovely bag off Grandma and Grandad what she loved and money off everybody else so she can buy lots of nice things.
So they went to the mall, they was going to go into town but it was raining. We said we would stay home and guard the house. Them had lunch at Soho coffee instead of the pasty shop cos them was feeling posh. Then them went in John Lewis and pretended to sleep in all the beds and see if they could fit an entire human in the freezers (only one was big enough for Daddy's body so Mummy say that's the one they'll have to get). Then they had to leave cos Mummy accidentally shouted how much cheaper you could buy everything in Ikea and one of the shop ladies give her a hard stare.
Then them went in HMV and Daddy tried a One Direction t-shirt on but it was too tight (on account of it being a little girls size) and Mummy was cross cos she wanted to buy Maximo Parks latest album but they didn't have any of their albums. This, apparently, is the reason why they is doing so badly.
Then they went in Marks and Spencer and Katie rolled about on one of the settees hugging a cat cushion until the others had to drag her out. So they went in Next and Mummy bought a big picture of a basset for over the fire in the new house.
Katie didn't find any clothes she wanted to buy so she was sad. Now they have come home but they say they is going to Pizza Hut for tea in a bit.
Oh and Mummy wanted to buy a macrame hanging basket to put her fly eating plant in but we think she might be 30 years too late.
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