I've seen the future and it's flat. By Sam

I had an epiphany...of sorts...yesterday.   Hobbling round Tesco on my way home from work in heels.  It was boiling hot, my feet ached and I found myself looking longingly at the flipflops.  Anyone who knows me will understand this was a serious situation.

And I had a sudden thought.    Why do I wear heels?  How many days/nights out have been ruined by heels?   Take the other weekend for instance.  We went clubbing.  I wore heels.  They were from the "comfort" range in New Look but were far from comfortable.  After approximately half an hour I took off my shoes and spent the rest of the night treading carefully through lager, sick and broken glass in my bare feet.  At one point a bouncer came over and asked me not to sit on a wall as there may be broken glass on it.  Never mind the wall, I thought.   I've got no bloody shoes on, I'm pretty sure the floor has got broken glass on it.

There was a lady on the dancefloor in trainers.   God but she looked comfy.  I wished my converses weren't back at the house under the settee.   Admittably she also looked like a lesbian.  I think she was a lesbian.   But that's not necessarily a negative.

So, anyway, from now on.  No more heels.  It's comfort over sexy, sassy, sophisticated, all those words that I fail miserably at.   I always look like Barbara Windsor in heels anyway.

My new mission in life is to find flat shoes that will still look good for weddings/nights out/stock controller training courses in fancy hotels.  I'm not sure such a thing exist.   But I will make it my business to find them.  Watch this space...